Thanks for Thanksgiving

The house is now quiet. Everyone is in blissful contentment, napping on the floor or couch, while the TV drones on quietly in the background. I am surrounded by the delectable smells leftover from cooking all day. I love Thanksgiving, everything about it! It is full of my two favorite things....food and family! It has still somehow escaped the commercialism of all the other holidays, and retained its pure intent. Sure, there's still the bustle involved with preparing mountains of food, knowing full well that it's way too much food for the number of people eating. But then there's the pure joy of sharing it with those you love, sitting crammed around a fancy table, knocking elbows, and piling your plate way too high. Then when everyone is full to the brim we can look around the table and truly be grateful for all our blessings.

This year Eric's parents flew up to spend Thanksgiving with us. It's been such a treat, especially compared to last year when we were by ourselves for the holiday. We've had fun shopping and getting our hair done together, and watching movies. Just being together is the best part!

The majority of today Terry and I spent in the kitchen. We had so much fun bumping into each other in my too-small kitchen, and comparing favorite recipes. We had our little mishaps too. I spilled a bunch of the turkey drippings as I was clumsily transferring it to another dish. Then before we could recover from laughing about that, Terry shook a container of corn starch and warm broth (meant for the gravy) and it exploded everywhere! We had cornstarch all over everything. We tried cleaning it up the best we could while laughing so hard, but kept finding it the rest of the day. It was dried onto our clothes, shoes, hair. I found a spot on my cheek like a beauty mark.

That must be part of what I love the most -- making new memories, reinforcing long-held traditions, and creating some new ones of our own. These are the things I remember for years down the road, long after I've forgotten what Aunt Jane got for Cousin Sue for Christmas. I am so thankful for the chance we have to create these lasting memories and give thanks for all that the Lord has blessed us with. I am thankful for Thanksgiving.

The cooks of the day!

Our beautiful table setting.

The Twilight Zone

There is a strange phenomenon gripping the suburbs of our country. It involves perfectly innocent, even ordinary housewives and teenagers alike. It is an obsession with the relationship between a teenage girl and her boyfriend. One who happens to be....a vampire.

Yes, I am ashamed to admit it. I fell into the trap as well. It all started, innocently enough, with reading a book for my Book Club. Everyone was reading it, couldn't put it down! And after all, it was written by an LDS gal in Arizona. Support our enterprizing members!

I started reading "Twilight" but had a difficult time getting into it at first. It was such an intimate look into the mind of a teenage girl, sometimes it made me feel uncomfortable. I remembered my own awkward teenage years....feelings of inadequacy, unsure of my place in the world or society, worrying about my grades, but even more, worrying about what other people thought of me. I can't say that I was very much like Bella, the main character of "Twilight," but it reawakened those memories I had of that period in my life.

Absolute misery.

I would never want to go back.

So I was hesitant about attaching myself to this story. Stephenie Meyers' writing style is not what I would refer to as literary genius. (The comparison of her to JK Rowling is ludicrous to me....she is not even in the same universe.) Parts of the story were cheesey or overly-dramatic. (I mean, really, do you have to turn around and try to be a martyr every week?) But Meyers is very clever here. She gets you hooked on the story line, intrigued with what's going to happen next. You are willing to trudge through the pages and pages of both repetitive and sappy descriptions of Edward's angelic face and how often he softly strokes Bella's cheek....ugh....just to find out....

Anyway, when it came down to it, I ate it up like everyone else. I joined the crowd who was so excited for the fourth and final installment of the book series, that I had to preorder it on Amazon, then waited on tender-hooks until it arrived. I stayed up late two nights in a row (I know, it should have been only one all-nighter but I do have a life, you know!) trying to finish it, then immediately tore it apart with my friends. ("Can you believe she did this?" and "What's with the ripped-apart bed-posts, anyway?") I do not want to give away any important parts for those of my friends still reading it (Are there really any of you out there?), so I will leave it there.

All this drama and excitement over a silly book series can only lead to one thing....a movie deal, of course! I rallied all my Book Club pals and organized a party to see the "Twilight" movie on opening night. We bought tickets in advance online, so as not to have to miss out on such a historic cultural phenomenon. Heidi, of course, went with me as well. All of her friends had read the books, and it was all they were talking about. I felt the series was a little too hormone-driven for the imagination of a 12-year old girl, but gave in to letting her see the movie.

The energy in that theater was palpable! I was surrounded by 12-year old girls, their high and constant chatter spiking up the energy of the room, and the voices of the mothers, competing with the near-hysteria of excitement. When the lights dimmed everyone cheered. Then as a hush fell over the crowd as it was about to start, one of the gals from my group yelled out, "I love you, Jacob!", starting a chorus of cheers and, "I love you, Edward!"'s all over the theater. This is the eternal debate of "Twilight," who should Bella be with....Edward or Jacob?

The debate continues....

The cheering and audience participation continued throughout the movie. Whenever a new character entered a scene, there would be cat-calls and whistles. Lines of dialogue immediately recognized from the book were cheered like words from an energized political speech. We were Meyers' faithful followers, and I don't think anyone left disappointed. All her true fans were just willing the movie to be phenomenal, whether it could live up to it or not, so of course it has succeeded.

Now the mayhem can die down a little.

Until the next movie, that is.

As for me, I find I admire the woman who inspired so many swooning teenage girls and their mothers to come together and discuss the same book so whole-heartedly. She woke up one morning after having a vivid dream. After writing it down and expanding it some, it eventually turned into one of the most successful young adult series of all time. Just an ordinary, run-of-the-mill mother and housewife.

Just like me.

I could relate to her, and yet I find I am a little envious. Being a break-out star of a writer was always my fantasy as well. Now if only I could have a really fabulous dream one night....

Update on Elise

So many people have been asking about Elise, so I wanted to let everyone know that she has been doing great. She looked really good today, much better than yesterday, and has started playing with her toys again. She still isn't eating great, but we are working on that. I am sure she will be even more herself by tomorrow! Thanks to everyone for your love and concern! We appreciate you!

Angel Elise

Our family had a bit of a scare this week with Elise. At about 10:00 pm she started having a seizure while in bed. Heidi noticed and called for us to come quickly. We soothed her and kept her airway clean the best we could, thinking that surely it would stop soon. However, it kept going. After about five minutes (which seems like ETERNITY), we gave her an emergency dose of anti-seizure medication and called the paramedics. They arrived very quickly, however, she was still seizing off-and-on. They took her and Eric in the ambulance down to Children's Hospital in Seattle. There they were finally able to stabilize her. She stayed overnight, and was released at about 7:00 the next night. She is making slow progress at home toward recovery. She is still very weak and unable to sit up. You can tell she is uncomfortable and it is making her frustrated.

Seizures are not a new thing for us, although thankfully they are still uncommon. Elise was born with a rare neurological condition called lissencephaly, or "smooth brain." Instead of developing ridges and valleys on the surface of her brain, it is very smooth. This changes the general make-up of the brain and triggers generalized seizures. It also causes severe mental and developmental disabilities.

Elise had her first seizure when she was only three months old. She curled up in a ball and started shaking uncontrollably. She was taking very labored, shallow breaths, and after about a minute her lips started turning blue. Once the shaking stopped, she became as limp as a rag doll and was completely unresponsive. We were terrified. We both knew what a seizure looked like, but nothing can describe the terror in seeing your own child go through it. When afterwards she was so unresponsive, I actually thought that I was watching my daughter die right in front of me, with nothing I could do about it. I distinctly remember praying all the way to the hospital saying, "Please don't take her away from me, I'm not ready to let her go."

At first the doctors were unable to determine why she was having seizures (she had two more at the hospital that day). They did a spinal tap and ran a CAT scan, with no evidence of problems. They put her on phenobarbitol for an undeterminable amount of time, and eventually sent us home. The phenobarbitol made Elise very drowsy. She would not do anything that it seemed like she should be doing. She showed no interest in toys, or tried raising her arms up. She seemed content to just sit in our laps all day.

When she was about eight months old I decided to take matters into my own hands. I felt like it seemed unnessecary to have her take a medication to prevent seizures when they didn't even know if she would ever have them again. And I felt sure that this drowsiness it caused was slowing down her development. Something just didn't seem right. So I started weening her off the phenobarbitol.

After about a month we started noticing that Elise would occassionally make little jerks for no apparent reason. Her doctor (we had moved and changed doctors throughout this time) was concerned about her delayed development and recommended we have some more tests run at Children's Hospital. She had an MRI done there, where they were finally able to see the problem and give us a diagnosis.

All I remember about that appointment was the physician assistant sitting down with us and saying, "Your daughter has lissencephaly," and that "she will probably never reach beyond a three- to five-month developmental level." And last, "she has a two-year life expectancy." That was all I could register.

We went home in a daze, then started poring over the internet for information. The information out there is not good. In fact, it was devastating to read. It was a very bleak time for us. There is no description adequate enough to portray the depth and range of emotions you go through as a parent. I had to mourn over a lot of things....loss of a normal, happy life for her, wondering if she could have meaning and fulfillment in her life, wondering if I would be able to cope with the different challenges it would present. I remember telling Eric the thing I feared the most was that I wouldn't have a personal relationship with her, that I wouldn't be able to see her own little spirit and personality coming through the disability. I wanted to feel like I knew her real spirit, that I could recognize her in the after-life. I really worried about that. Luckily I was very wrong to worry there. I now feel like I know her very well.

Once we had a diagnosis and the appropriate medications were given to her, we were able to tackle the new world we were entering armed and ready. We learned that motor skills, as well as speech and oral skills, are greatly affected by this condition. So Elise started "school." At first a physical therapist came to our house twice a week. Elise used to cry every time she saw her coming, because she knew she would make her work! Eventually she started going to a developmental preschool where she received physical and speech therapy (she still had troubles eating). When she turned three she started going to school four days a week. She still doesn't like her physical therapist, no matter how nice she is to her!

Elise has made huge strides in her development! She eventually learned how to sit on her own and roll around. Gradually she figured out that she could get places a lot faster by scooting around while sitting on her bum. She has actually gotten very fast at this! She is also developing her fine motor skills, grabbing and grasping small items. She has also improved her eating skills. At first she would not chew her food, just squish it against the roof of her mouth and swallow. Now she can chew and swallow a variety of things and loves to feed herself.

But the thing I love the most is that she has a very definite personality. She is very sweet and loving. She loves to laugh. She can sit in front of the mirror and play with herself for hours. She loves music and will bounce to the beat whenever she hears something fun. She is a Daddy's Girl through and through, he is all she wants when he comes through the door. She is also very independent, like she should be. She gets frustrated when we try to do something for her that she feels she should do herself.

To wrap up our story, Elise is now four years old. She has been very lucky in how well her medications have been able to keep her seizures under control. She has had very few, and none nearly as tramatic as the one this week. She has developed far beyond the doctors' expectations of her. I know that none of this is just by chance, it is a special blessing from our Father in Heaven. She is our little miracle!

Music of My Soul

It seems like ages ago that I was back in Junior High, performing in our Orchestra concerts. I played the violin, from 5th grade to Senior year. I was never a proficient, but I sure enjoyed playing the music! My first love was playing the piano, but I also really loved the violin. I loved the fact that even if you weren't perfect and solo-worthy in your individual performance, you can still feel a part of creating something beautiful. The music that comes from children can truly be magical, mistakes and all.

One of the things I remember most is that both my parents always went to all my concerts. Every concert, recital, tryout, rehearsal, you name it. They were so supportive. They were always proud of me, even when I was disappointed in my performance. I don't know if I appreciated it then, because it just seemed natural for them to be there, but now I know what they had to sacrifice for me to be involved in music. I am truly grateful....not just for the support, but for instilling in me the love of music and performance, and making it a priority in our lives.

Now the legacy gets to continue. Heidi started in Band last year, playing the flute. She only got to be in a few concerts, since they were just beginning, but this year there are a lot more performances to enjoy.

I can't tell you how proud I am to watch her out there playing with this big group of kids. She worked so hard before their first evaluation, and she made First Chair!! I have never been more proud! The Band played several patriotic songs, including the Star-Spangled Banner, and the combination of emotions I felt just brought tears to my eyes. I think it made me feel even more of a connection with my parents. I am so grateful that I can pass on those priorities I learned from them on to the next generation.

Trick or Treat?

The kids had a great time for Halloween this year, or at least I hope they did. Every year seems like a marathon of rushing from work, getting dinner, cramming kids in costumes, dragging them soggy and cold around the block, then trying to get them into bed after ingesting a scary amount of sugar. And we do this every year because.....

Anyway, I had fun dressing the two little girls. They were matching since I still have a say in what they wear, unlike their more stubborn siblings. They were my little pumpkins. Ethan was a ninja AGAIN, and Heidi dressed up as a scary teenager (a peek just around the corner for us!) We were in three separate parties this year. Eric manned the homefront with Erica, passing out treats to all the neighbor kids. Heidi went to a haunted house with her friends in Seattle. And I took Ethan and Elise trick-or-treating. It was really a mild night, with just a little moisture, so we lucked out. It was Elise's first time trick-or-treating. She wasn't too sure about the experience! She fussed a lot and kept tugging at her hat. Then she slumped in her wheelchair the rest of the time, making all the generous home-owners very concerned for her! "Wow, she is really wiped out!" with the undercurrent of "I can't believe what a bad mother you are! Take that girl home!" After about an hour of this, this became my sentiments as well! Home we went, to stay up late waiting for our first-born to return and gorging on way too much candy!

Happy Birthday Eric!

Eric hit the milestone of 37 this year. He went quietly, not too much of a tantrum. The girls loved the cake. Erica couldn't keep her eyes off the candles once they were lit. Then I think Elise even tried to blow them out! It sure seemed like it, anyway!

That weekend we took the kids to the Great Wolf Lodge for a treat. It is a family resort just south of Olympia. It has a huge indoor waterpark, which the kids LOVED. Ethan was 1/2 inch too short for the coolest slide and he was devastated. I was surprised that they were such sticklers about the rules! There was also a wave pool, which created waves like at the beach. I felt like we were back in Hawaii...well, maybe not quite! We had a great time anyway!