Seeing the Rainbow

This is a picture my dad took when he was here visiting for our spring break.

One of my patients at work had a rough time last year with difficult illnesses and hospital stays.  For a while her family did not think that she was going to pull through it.  I was devastated when I heard the news.  I feel a special connection with her because she reminds me so much of Elise.

When I see her mom bring her in to the office it makes me think about how that will be me and Elise in fifteen years.  She calls her "her buddy," and they go everywhere together.  She gives everyone she sees hugs, while laughing and smiling.  It broke my heart to think of never seeing her again.

My special little friend came into the office again today to get her teeth cleaned.  After multiple hospital stays and surgeries, she is finally back to her happy bubbly self.  I was on the verge of tears the entire visit.  I had never been so happy to give that girl hug after hug after hug.

Sometimes I think about the future as Elise's mother and caregiver.  Sometimes it is scary.  My patient's mother has been through so many trials with her daughter, keeping her healthy and getting the therapy and care which her condition demands.  And yet, through all the struggles, she has only ever been grateful to have the privilege of raising such a sweet spirit.

It reminded me of something President Dieter F. Uchtdorf said in his talk during our recent General Conference.  "How much of life do we miss by waiting to see the rainbow before thanking God that there is rain."

Some may see having a child with a disability as a trial.  I used to think so as well.  But then I was plunged head first into that world myself.  I am constantly bombarded with the day to day struggle of feeding, dressing and caring for a child with special needs, one who is completely reliant on me for her most basic care.  I live in continual fear of the next episode of seizures, with the overhanging possibility that the next time we won't be so lucky, and she could have serious after effects.

But I have also been enveloped in the warm embrace of Elise's monster hugs and caught her blown kisses from the air.  I have been surrounded by the music of her infectious laugh and marveled at every miraculous milestone.

I have never been so grateful for a trial in my life.

Elise has always helped me see the rainbow, even before it is ready to be revealed, all because I am not afraid to get a little wet.